Walking through the dark forest

Breakdown often comes before breakthrough.  This is where I have found myself these past few days.

A woman faces a man.  She is hunched, sad, shrunken, half her size, it is cold and dark.  He has a heavy heart, he paces in a small circle, head bowed.  She takes a step back to observe this scene, she cries.  She takes another step back and watches what unfolds.  The woman grows in stature, empowers herself, smiles, the sun comes out as she hears the birds sing.  He looks up at her, he stands tall and immediately stops his pacing.  They both breathe a sigh of relief.

I stand in a clearing facing what feels like an immense, dark forest.  I feel the shadow from the forest envelop me.  I am cold.  I am afraid.  I feel the heavy weight of my tears.  I must take the first step towards the forest, head into the unknown.  I know I must walk through the forest to reach the sunny glade that I know lies beyond.  I am scared and my fear paralyses me.  I wait.  I have one more thing to do before I embark on this journey through the darkness of the forest. Tears rack my body, my body trembles.  I feel abandoned, so alone.  I feel weak and helpless on one hand, yet know that my decision to face the unknown that lies in and beyond the forest shows my individual strength.  I will not deny myself any longer, however painful and desperate I feel.

I will not be alone in my journey through the forest.  I have my trusted angels with me.  One carries a torch to light my way when I lose the track, when I lose my way and feel weak. I carry the heart shaped stone I found on the beach, it represents the love of my parents for me.  I carry the love of my children in my heart.  My angels walk at my side and behind me.  I will lead the way.  I am taking the road less travelled.

I can see the glade that is in full sun, it beckons me.  I trust it is there.  He is standing there in the glade, his arms outstretched, he smiles, his eyes draw me to him.  He is all sunshine.  I don’t need to know why he is there, for what reason.  All will be well.

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One Response to “Walking through the dark forest”

  1. Anne Wilson Says:

    Beautiful – thank you for sharing Rebecca. You are very special. Love Anne XXX

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